Let me paint the picture. It is 11:00 am and I am at the liquor store. “11:00 am?” You say. Yep, these are the last minutes I have before I go to pick up my toddler at preschool. Truth be told, I would rather bare the stigma of the a.m. liquor store run than the dirty looks I get when I buy wine with a screaming kid in tow.
There is a cart parked in the middle of the checkout line
with a 24 pack of Bud Light. Somewhere
to the left, is a man looking at vodka.
Having two minutes until I need to be in the car for preschool pick up,
I skirt around the carriage to the waiting cashier.
Suddenly, the man milling, steps back in front of the
carriage. I realize I have jumped in
front of him.
“Sorry!” I say. “I didn't realize you were in line.”
He smiles, gives me a wink and replies. “Oh no, you go.
Chivalry is not dead.”
Chivalry is not dead?
Hasn't it been slowly dying since its inception during medieval
times? Didn't the feminist movement put
the final nails in that coffin?
Don't get me wrong, I am all for guys letting me cut them in
line. Paying for dinner and pulling the
car up to the doors of a store on a rainy day.
It is one of the advantages of being female.
But if you look closely at the code of conduct chivalry
entailed, you will see it was not just for men but for women too. Let me give you an example. One rule of chivalry is that a man is to
“take care of his lady first...” In modern
times this has translated into such things as opening doors for a woman.
If a man is to open your door for you then you are obligated,
under this code of conduct, to stand there and wait for him to open it.
What if he notices a scuff on the bumper of his car and stops
to buff it? What if he realizes he has
left his keys in the house? You must
stand there and wait.... and wait.... and wait.
Sigh!
I would much rather just open the handle and sit down in the
car. If he is buffs the scuff on the bumper,
I will turn up the heat and switch the radio station. Because we all know, as a woman, we want the
heat much higher than the man we are riding with does.
On a larger scale, I appreciate all my husband does around
our house but I often don't want to wait for him to do it. Chivalry dictates he
run all power equipment, lest I get injured.
But the leaf blower and power washer are kind of fun. Similarly, I like to cook but if my husband
offers to take over my womanly duties for an evening, I say “Have at it!”
Chivalry is fundamentally a code were strong men take care of
weak women. In our modern society of
equality, I say that it is far better to embrace rules that encourage kindness
towards others regardless of sex. That includes men helping me with jobs I
struggle with or just don't want to do.
But, Thanks to feminism, a man can also expect his lady to
open his door for him on occasion. Try
not to get too annoyed when I buff the scratch out while you wait.
