Chivalry is not Dead?

Let me paint the picture.  It is 11:00 am and I am at the liquor store.  “11:00 am?” You say.  Yep, these are the last minutes I have before I go to pick up my toddler at preschool.  Truth be told, I would rather bare the stigma of the a.m. liquor store run than the dirty looks I get when I buy wine with a screaming kid in tow.

There is a cart parked in the middle of the checkout line with a 24 pack of Bud Light.  Somewhere to the left, is a man looking at vodka.  Having two minutes until I need to be in the car for preschool pick up, I skirt around the carriage to the waiting cashier.

Suddenly, the man milling, steps back in front of the carriage.  I realize I have jumped in front of him.

“Sorry!”  I say.  “I didn't realize you were in line.”

He smiles, gives me a wink and replies. “Oh no, you go. Chivalry is not dead.”

Chivalry is not dead?  Hasn't it been slowly dying since its inception during medieval times?  Didn't the feminist movement put the final nails in that coffin?

Don't get me wrong, I am all for guys letting me cut them in line.  Paying for dinner and pulling the car up to the doors of a store on a rainy day.  It is one of the advantages of being female.

But if you look closely at the code of conduct chivalry entailed, you will see it was not just for men but for women too.  Let me give you an example.  One rule of chivalry is that a man is to “take care of his lady first...”  In modern times this has translated into such things as opening doors for a woman.

If a man is to open your door for you then you are obligated, under this code of conduct, to stand there and wait for him to open it.

What if he notices a scuff on the bumper of his car and stops to buff it?  What if he realizes he has left his keys in the house?  You must stand there and wait.... and wait.... and wait.  Sigh!

I would much rather just open the handle and sit down in the car.  If he is buffs the scuff on the bumper, I will turn up the heat and switch the radio station.  Because we all know, as a woman, we want the heat much higher than the man we are riding with does.

On a larger scale, I appreciate all my husband does around our house but I often don't want to wait for him to do it. Chivalry dictates he run all power equipment, lest I get injured.  But the leaf blower and power washer are kind of fun.  Similarly, I like to cook but if my husband offers to take over my womanly duties for an evening, I say “Have at it!”

Chivalry is fundamentally a code were strong men take care of weak women.  In our modern society of equality, I say that it is far better to embrace rules that encourage kindness towards others regardless of sex. That includes men helping me with jobs I struggle with or just don't want to do.

But, Thanks to feminism, a man can also expect his lady to open his door for him on occasion.  Try not to get too annoyed when I buff the scratch out while you wait.